A recent wikileaks document has revealed that John McCain had favorable dealings with Muammar Gaddafi as late as 2009. Apparently the document shows that McCain was willing to secure weapons for the dictator.
McCain's stance on Libya took a flip-flop when the Obama administration got involved in the conflict. On the Senate floor, McCain chastised the administration for not attacking Gaddafi soon enough, for not being strong against oppression, etc. etc. This coming from the man that wholeheartedly supported the regime not a scant two years earlier. How embarrassing.
We have a word, Mr. McCain, for those that say one thing and do another...
They're called Republicans.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
The Right Wing. Mmmm...Nom Nom Nom
This from NOM (The National Organization for Marriage)
To say that the right wing has gone off the deep end is an understatement to end all understatements.
How do these people put on pants in the morning? And drive cars? And navigate the varied complexities of normal life, like buying coffee with correct change, and making sandwiches. You'd think they are so concerned with their own retarded development that all of the above would be impossible. But no. And then they manage to get elected. To government. In the United States. It boggles the mind.
It also boggles the mind that they are concerned with who is sucking who and who is fucking who while real problems affect real people on a real scale. "What? People are starving all over the world? The teenage sex trade is rampant? Hey! Get your dick out of there!"
Here's my ammended pledge for Michele-even-in-this-fucked-political-climate-will-never-be-elected-president-but-thanks-for-trying-Bachmann:
I, Michele Bachmann, if elected President, I will: Buy a shit ton of meth, snort every last sparkling crystal, climb the nearest rooftop naked, put a large caliber weapon to my head and pull the trigger while yelling: "I'm coming Jesus! I'm coming!"
I think that would be a more fitting and apropos ending for the comedian.
To say that the right wing has gone off the deep end is an understatement to end all understatements.
How do these people put on pants in the morning? And drive cars? And navigate the varied complexities of normal life, like buying coffee with correct change, and making sandwiches. You'd think they are so concerned with their own retarded development that all of the above would be impossible. But no. And then they manage to get elected. To government. In the United States. It boggles the mind.
It also boggles the mind that they are concerned with who is sucking who and who is fucking who while real problems affect real people on a real scale. "What? People are starving all over the world? The teenage sex trade is rampant? Hey! Get your dick out of there!"
Here's my ammended pledge for Michele-even-in-this-fucked-political-climate-will-never-be-elected-president-but-thanks-for-trying-Bachmann:
I, Michele Bachmann, if elected President, I will: Buy a shit ton of meth, snort every last sparkling crystal, climb the nearest rooftop naked, put a large caliber weapon to my head and pull the trigger while yelling: "I'm coming Jesus! I'm coming!"
I think that would be a more fitting and apropos ending for the comedian.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
The American People...personified.
Currently, the American People are like a hooker that pays you for a blowjob.
The People: *Cough* *Gurgle* "We done? That's 50 bucks."
The Banks: "Thanks hon. Put it in my back pocket while I wipe my dick in your curtains. And don't forget the tip."
Crude? Yes. Accurate? Yes.
Needs changing? Yup.
The People: *Cough* *Gurgle* "We done? That's 50 bucks."
The Banks: "Thanks hon. Put it in my back pocket while I wipe my dick in your curtains. And don't forget the tip."
Crude? Yes. Accurate? Yes.
Needs changing? Yup.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Democracy's Zombified Corpse
You smell that? That's the rotting corpse of Democracy shambling around, smelling things up. You see, a monumental, devastating decision was passed down from the vampires we call The Supreme Court today in a decision on Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission. Remember this name well--it will be used in conjunction with: "and that's why America failed," a lot.
The court case said in a 5 to 4 decision (no surprise there--Alito? Roberts? the lingering fecal matter of the Bush regime?) that corporations are indeed people and that money is free speech and therefore corporations can spend as much money as they like in any election any time. Goodbye campaign finance reform. Goodbye democracy--it was nice knowing you.
The problems with this type of reasoning are of course infinite. If money is indeed free speech (the irony of calling money "free" is laughable in itself) then those with more money, have more speech. I have a distinct feeling that this is not what the framers meant when they wrote the amendment. I have a feeling that they meant, I dunno, people with mouths to have free speech, not corporate entities, constructions of the mind that lack souls. In fact Thomas Jefferson himself once said: "I hope we shall crush in its birth the aristocracy of our monied corporations which dare already to challenge our government to a trial of strength and bid defiance to the laws of our country." Oh, Thomas--if you only knew.
The spiraling degradation of democracy is further sped up as any lawmakers with the temerity to even suggest that corporate finace reform be introduced will now be, quite loudly with all the money that will flow, removed from office and replaced with a more "moderate, sensible" candidate. Of course no such lawmaker will introduce any such legislation at all--this decision has a chilling effect (like a blizzard) on the halls of democracy; lawmakers now know to keep their mouths shut--or face the consequences. What's left is a sad play, dramatizing any real governance--puppets on a corporate stage, spouting lines given to them by their puppeteers, muted to any real democratic concerns.
One can also kiss goodbye all sorts of important legislation and pending legislation that might have come in the future: environmental legislation, labor reform, corporate finance reform, financial institution reform, union membership, all in the rear-view mirror. These types of legistlation directly affect the corporate entities that now have to power to stack congress with those that will be more amenable to their vision of America--one without strong environmental laws, one without strong labor laws, one without restrictions on banks and other financial institutions, one without the freedom to unionize witout harrassing obstacles, one without restictions on oil-drilling, one without laws to protect consumers and on and on.
Who is the architect of this you ask? A) a wide eyed liberal who just can't stand to see free speech violated. B) a level headed constitutional scholar who just can't stand to see free speech violated, or C) a rabid conservative right winger who couldn't give a fuck about the first ammendment except that laws as they stood barred his beloved ideas of corporate power knowing full well that this would open the flood gates to republican rule of government. If you guessed C, you'd of course be right.
Here is said scumbag:
Say hello David Bossie--he will go down in history as the man who killed democracy.
What comes of this is an end to an era. Barring a miraculous last ditch movement by the slack jawed and drooling, reatlity TV watching, idiot masses, the good ol' US of A will be plunged into the dark ages of a coporatocracy. A plutocracy of greed and power. A county where we as citizens are second class to an instituional collection of entitites that quite seriously, lack souls. It is a sad day in a long line of sad days to come.
"See that rotting, smelly thing over there, Sweetheart?"
"Yeah, Daddy. What is it?"
"That's Democracy, Pumpkin."
"Ewww. Get it away from me."
The court case said in a 5 to 4 decision (no surprise there--Alito? Roberts? the lingering fecal matter of the Bush regime?) that corporations are indeed people and that money is free speech and therefore corporations can spend as much money as they like in any election any time. Goodbye campaign finance reform. Goodbye democracy--it was nice knowing you.
The problems with this type of reasoning are of course infinite. If money is indeed free speech (the irony of calling money "free" is laughable in itself) then those with more money, have more speech. I have a distinct feeling that this is not what the framers meant when they wrote the amendment. I have a feeling that they meant, I dunno, people with mouths to have free speech, not corporate entities, constructions of the mind that lack souls. In fact Thomas Jefferson himself once said: "I hope we shall crush in its birth the aristocracy of our monied corporations which dare already to challenge our government to a trial of strength and bid defiance to the laws of our country." Oh, Thomas--if you only knew.
The spiraling degradation of democracy is further sped up as any lawmakers with the temerity to even suggest that corporate finace reform be introduced will now be, quite loudly with all the money that will flow, removed from office and replaced with a more "moderate, sensible" candidate. Of course no such lawmaker will introduce any such legislation at all--this decision has a chilling effect (like a blizzard) on the halls of democracy; lawmakers now know to keep their mouths shut--or face the consequences. What's left is a sad play, dramatizing any real governance--puppets on a corporate stage, spouting lines given to them by their puppeteers, muted to any real democratic concerns.
One can also kiss goodbye all sorts of important legislation and pending legislation that might have come in the future: environmental legislation, labor reform, corporate finance reform, financial institution reform, union membership, all in the rear-view mirror. These types of legistlation directly affect the corporate entities that now have to power to stack congress with those that will be more amenable to their vision of America--one without strong environmental laws, one without strong labor laws, one without restrictions on banks and other financial institutions, one without the freedom to unionize witout harrassing obstacles, one without restictions on oil-drilling, one without laws to protect consumers and on and on.
Who is the architect of this you ask? A) a wide eyed liberal who just can't stand to see free speech violated. B) a level headed constitutional scholar who just can't stand to see free speech violated, or C) a rabid conservative right winger who couldn't give a fuck about the first ammendment except that laws as they stood barred his beloved ideas of corporate power knowing full well that this would open the flood gates to republican rule of government. If you guessed C, you'd of course be right.
Here is said scumbag:
Say hello David Bossie--he will go down in history as the man who killed democracy.
What comes of this is an end to an era. Barring a miraculous last ditch movement by the slack jawed and drooling, reatlity TV watching, idiot masses, the good ol' US of A will be plunged into the dark ages of a coporatocracy. A plutocracy of greed and power. A county where we as citizens are second class to an instituional collection of entitites that quite seriously, lack souls. It is a sad day in a long line of sad days to come.
"See that rotting, smelly thing over there, Sweetheart?"
"Yeah, Daddy. What is it?"
"That's Democracy, Pumpkin."
"Ewww. Get it away from me."
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Funniest Shit Ever
I was hanging out with some friends and as is a sign of the times we were surfing YouTube to find whatever funny shit we could find. Someone suggested this. It's long, but well worth it:
Not only is this the core of hilarity, but it gets better. See Yoda on the wall? See PHOTOSHOPPED Yoda on the wall, holding what could only be the Urantia bible (see the Urantia wiki for what THAT business is all about: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urantia). That is just pure awesome. Any religion that openly suggests that Yoda would make a perfect ambassador needs a serious self-examination. But you got to give it to these guys for unabashed go-for-it-ness. They don't give a fuck.
Okay, so if that isn't the best ever--there is the side-branch. You can get a celestial soul-portrait done by, I'm guessing, one of the members of the church. Here are some examples:
Look at it! LOOK AT IT!!
Now look at the background....
Somehow, he magically fiddles himself to Hawaii! What?!
This is Arielle. Someone must have just given her one for Christ-Urantia-mas.
Poor, poor Arielle.
And my favorite...
Wait for it....
BAM!! This guy's gonna blast a small third-world country out of existence... with his mind!
Oh yeah! I want one. If anyone wants to donate $150 so I can get a celestial soul-portrait done--send it my way. Be assured that it will be framed, and it WILL be put up somewhere in the house.
Not only is this the core of hilarity, but it gets better. See Yoda on the wall? See PHOTOSHOPPED Yoda on the wall, holding what could only be the Urantia bible (see the Urantia wiki for what THAT business is all about: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urantia). That is just pure awesome. Any religion that openly suggests that Yoda would make a perfect ambassador needs a serious self-examination. But you got to give it to these guys for unabashed go-for-it-ness. They don't give a fuck.
Okay, so if that isn't the best ever--there is the side-branch. You can get a celestial soul-portrait done by, I'm guessing, one of the members of the church. Here are some examples:
Now look at the background....
And my favorite...
Wait for it....
BAM!! This guy's gonna blast a small third-world country out of existence... with his mind!
Oh yeah! I want one. If anyone wants to donate $150 so I can get a celestial soul-portrait done--send it my way. Be assured that it will be framed, and it WILL be put up somewhere in the house.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Neocons Respond to Avatar
Okay, while I found the story itself to be woefully two-dimensional, the characters tired clones of other tired characters, and the wrap up fairly silly, I have to say anything that pisses off both the Neocons of the world AND evangelical Christians, has my vote.
It's funny, but Neocons from time immemorial have been excoriating Hollywood for it's liberal agenda, its leftist morality plays, its hippie-friendly themes, but give them a television show like 24 and they just can't help but clap and giggle like a schoolgirl at the glee-club pep rally. If they had their way, every single movie would have dark bearded men stalking white women getting punched in the jaw by an Aryian looking dude with an American flag tatooed across his face, "You just messed with the wrong Red Blooded American, terrorist!"
You see, the reason this stuff pisses neocons off, is that they lack any imagination whatsoever. They love the infinitesimal world they support (and are supported by), and they can't see beyond it. They can't even imagine how it must be to live on the other end of their most valued policies--they can't imagine suffering, inescapable poverty, or their families being killed by machines stamped with "Made in America" across their armored shells.
Well, until 24 becomes a flop of a movie let us hold our glasses up high and salute yet another year of movie making that will, Gods willing, piss off yet more neocon dullards.
It's funny, but Neocons from time immemorial have been excoriating Hollywood for it's liberal agenda, its leftist morality plays, its hippie-friendly themes, but give them a television show like 24 and they just can't help but clap and giggle like a schoolgirl at the glee-club pep rally. If they had their way, every single movie would have dark bearded men stalking white women getting punched in the jaw by an Aryian looking dude with an American flag tatooed across his face, "You just messed with the wrong Red Blooded American, terrorist!"
You see, the reason this stuff pisses neocons off, is that they lack any imagination whatsoever. They love the infinitesimal world they support (and are supported by), and they can't see beyond it. They can't even imagine how it must be to live on the other end of their most valued policies--they can't imagine suffering, inescapable poverty, or their families being killed by machines stamped with "Made in America" across their armored shells.
Well, until 24 becomes a flop of a movie let us hold our glasses up high and salute yet another year of movie making that will, Gods willing, piss off yet more neocon dullards.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Avatar in a Glowy Nutshell
Just a quick take on Avatar. For the sake of the entry I'm going to talk about this from a strictly screenplay angle. Visually, the movie was fantastic, riveting, and groundbreaking. One gets used to the blue people and they take on a very realistic stance in the movie. Likewise, the CG there is unbelievable. This represents one step closer to the time when CG humans will actually come off as other than wooden and creepy.
Okay, to the screenplay. The antithesis of the visuals, largely it lacked anything original or riveting. It was a frankensteinian pastiche of ideas come and gone before. But even that aside, it relied on additional moments and themes that were unexcusably horrid in conception and execution. The movie really was Dances with Wolves in space, or as a friend of mine likes to call it, Dances with Smurfs.
The white man (earthling) saving the day from the savages that just can't get it together without him is a bit tired. (Dances with Wolves, The Last Samurai, numerous slave narratives). It seems to me an outgrowth of white-man guilt at the unabashed slaughter of natives the world over. Now, it is THOSE white people that are bad, and we're better than that now. Why an evolved and advance native culture can't have their own heroes that kick ass on the invading forces is a mystery to me. Perhaps it's because the reigning audiences aren't native cultures themselves--an outgrowth of the very real domination of those cultures by the ancestors of the very people making the movies today. And those people are out for one thing--to sell tickets. I guess dark heroes just aren't selling these days. Perhaps if native peoples had invented gun-powder before Eurpoeans, it would be they that were the heroes in the movies, and us, the cowering idiots casting about for a saviour.
But that's not all, as bad as it is. The most offensive part of the narrative is the reliance on a rusted and dusty convention widely knows as the Deus ex Machina. It is only at the beseechment of the white saviour that God comes down and does the actual ass-kicking. When all is lost, God descends from the sky, and cascades over the ground, to bring reckoning to the dastardly invaders. Why the great Earth Mother didn't decide to do this earlier is a mystery. Perhaps she only comes out when the white man asks--either that, or her own people are too stupid to figure this one out for themselves. Natives: "Why didn't you save us?" God: "You never asked."
That being said, I'm sure it'll be a great success, and white people the world over will feel all fuzzy about themselves. And the gnawing little gnat in their heads reminding them that this is going on right now, in this world, to real people, will go unlistened to--again: "Hey that CG was great! Let's go get a Big Mac."
Okay, to the screenplay. The antithesis of the visuals, largely it lacked anything original or riveting. It was a frankensteinian pastiche of ideas come and gone before. But even that aside, it relied on additional moments and themes that were unexcusably horrid in conception and execution. The movie really was Dances with Wolves in space, or as a friend of mine likes to call it, Dances with Smurfs.
The white man (earthling) saving the day from the savages that just can't get it together without him is a bit tired. (Dances with Wolves, The Last Samurai, numerous slave narratives). It seems to me an outgrowth of white-man guilt at the unabashed slaughter of natives the world over. Now, it is THOSE white people that are bad, and we're better than that now. Why an evolved and advance native culture can't have their own heroes that kick ass on the invading forces is a mystery to me. Perhaps it's because the reigning audiences aren't native cultures themselves--an outgrowth of the very real domination of those cultures by the ancestors of the very people making the movies today. And those people are out for one thing--to sell tickets. I guess dark heroes just aren't selling these days. Perhaps if native peoples had invented gun-powder before Eurpoeans, it would be they that were the heroes in the movies, and us, the cowering idiots casting about for a saviour.
But that's not all, as bad as it is. The most offensive part of the narrative is the reliance on a rusted and dusty convention widely knows as the Deus ex Machina. It is only at the beseechment of the white saviour that God comes down and does the actual ass-kicking. When all is lost, God descends from the sky, and cascades over the ground, to bring reckoning to the dastardly invaders. Why the great Earth Mother didn't decide to do this earlier is a mystery. Perhaps she only comes out when the white man asks--either that, or her own people are too stupid to figure this one out for themselves. Natives: "Why didn't you save us?" God: "You never asked."
That being said, I'm sure it'll be a great success, and white people the world over will feel all fuzzy about themselves. And the gnawing little gnat in their heads reminding them that this is going on right now, in this world, to real people, will go unlistened to--again: "Hey that CG was great! Let's go get a Big Mac."
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